September 2008 Archives

Norma and I on our way to see Mama Mia on Broadway! We were so excited! It was Friday night! It was New York City! It was a Yellow Cab! It was Broadway! And we are simple country folk in the big city for the night!

As Matt covered off in his Blog, we met, fell in love and lived happily ever after... well we thought we were living happily ever after, but something was clearly missing. It took our Canadian friend Michelle who was over from Kingston, ON for my birthday to point out the missing link. We were walking along the Thames, in glorious spring weather, when Michelle said "So when are you two going to have kids?". Well I almost choked! A spirited conversation took place and it became blatantly obvious to me that it was something Matt wanted dearly. I had thought about it, but figured the only option available to us was Adoption which honestly did not appeal to me. I have the utmost respect to people who do adopt and I know many who have, but it's not something I was keen on pursuing. Matt mentioned Surrogacy and I honestly thought that was only for the very rich... how wrong I was. A week later I found myself on a tube (subway) to a hotel in central London to meet with John Weltman of Circle Surrogacy. I shall never forget the drive home from London that evening. Our Lesbian friends had just discovered that very day that they were expecting twins (they had used sperm donation here in the UK which is pretty simple for woman to do). I felt this surge of lovely jealousy! Not that kind of horrible jealousy, but a real "I want that too" type of jealousy. Matt and I talked and talked and talked all the way home. By the time we pulled into the drive we had decided to change our lives forever. It had immediate implications. No more shopping at Ralph Lauren (Unless it's on sale at Macy's eh Norma?), no more expensive holidays to the Caribbean and we needed to tighten our belts on a day to day basis. Which was quite easy to do once we had made the decision to have kids as we simply focused on the fact that we were going to do this.

We already had a holiday booked to Canada for late June 2008. After signing up with Circle, we were put in touch with Dr Doyle at CFA. We had a telephone conversation with him and both of us decided he was the Doctor we wanted. He was so supportive, so informative and so patient. No question was considered silly and he answered everything clearly and concisely. He is based in Connecticut so Matt and I decided when we visited Canada we were going to do a Road Trip and visit CFA (Have our initial blood work done while we were there), then drive up to Boston and meet with the team at Circle. When we arrived at CFA we were met by Sharron who made us feel so at home and relaxed all the worry about the procedures disappeared! One thing you learn VERY quickly is that all dignity must be left at the door of the IVF Clinic!! When handed a cup and asked to Ejaculate into it, followed by being asked the most personal questions about your sexual history, it leaves you feeling more than a little uneasy! BUT Sharron was and continues to be utterly marvellous with us! After we were done at CFA we headed north to Boston and met with Anne, Rachael, Gina-Marie and Catherine amongst others! Handed a box of donuts and a coffee we were offered a seat in a lovely room overlooking Boston harbour and the airport. Rachael asked us if we had checked our email yet and we replied that we had not. She said, "Ok, good, because we have found you a carrier (surrogate)!" I almost dropped my coffee and felt like the rug had been pulled out from underneath me... in a good way! If I had not been sitting down, I would have fallen over!! We were then told all about Norma! Well, Matt and I left Circle feeling shaky and so excited! We did not expect to be matched much before Christmas 2008. Bearing in mind we signed up with Circle in mid April and this was late June it was a phenomenal turn round time! We drove back to Canada crossing the border at about 9pm. We sat chatting late into the night with our Canadian friends. On Thursday 3^rd July Sharron got in touch to say all our blood work had come back clear and we were good to go! We then heard from Circle that we were due to talk to Norma for the first time that Saturday (5^th July). Both Matt and I were terribly nervous... this was the woman who would potentially carry our babies for us! What if she did not like us? What if we did not like her? What if? What if? What if? The time came and we rang Norma from Canada... palms sweating... Matt and I trying not to sound nervous... Norma answered the phone. Within 2 minutes we were laughing and chatting and all nervousness seemed to vanish! We were on the phone for quite a while that first time. A week later we arrived back in the UK and we spoke again on the phone. After that we spoke every single day either via email or by phone - mostly by BOTH! Then Norma received word that she was to have all her tests done in August. I spoke with Matt and we decided I should join Norma. Meet her at the Airport in New York and drive her to the clinic! This was so she would not have to do all this on her own and it would give me a chance to meet her!

And so it was decided. I flew into New York about 3 hours before Norma did. We met at JFK and within minutes of being in the car, negotiating New York traffic on the WRONG side of the road in RUSH HOUR, we were giggling and chatting like old friends! Being honked at by angry impatient drivers, but we were having the time of our lives! And it truly felt like that. There was nothing false about how we were feeling. Both of us were a little nervous to start, but given the amount of contact we had had in the previous weeks, that was all gone within minutes of meeting! Norma and I arrived in Connecticut, narrowly missed a Tornado and checked into our hotel. That night Norma was a little nervous given all the tests she needed to have done the next morning, so we had a quiet dinner in the hotel and relaxed. We chatted and laughed and chatted for ages over dinner! The next day Norma had her tests done and everything was fine! The only small snag we had was that no one at CFA had heard from our Egg Donor... and we had not heard from her either... so the hunt started. Norma and I went on our way and enjoyed a Broadway show and pizza in New York city that night, went shopping the next morning and then Norma and I headed home. A week later, still no sign of our Egg Donor. She had been AWOL for a month. So we decided to source another Egg Donor through CFA. And BOY are we THRILLED with her! Everything seems to happen for a reason and she is just marvellous! Not long after I returned to the UK we sorted a webcam for Norma and now most nights Matt and I are huddled in front of a laptop chatting to and saying hi to Norma and her kids, like they lived next door!

So here we are. On the cusp of it all happening. Matt and I fly out to New York in less than a month and Matt get's to meet Norma in person and we get to make some embryos... more to follow!  

 

June 25th 2008 ~ After all the emails, phone calls, medical screenings, credit checks and mental screenings.....The long awaited "match" process had been completed! I am officially matched with a wonderful couple from London. They are funny, caring, eager and looking forward to being parents. A dream they never thought would come true for them.

We plan on sharing tons of communication. We will stay in contact via phone, email and web cam. They also are coming out to my 20 week ultrasound and they will be here for the birth of the baby or babies (if we are really lucky!). I have my first doctor appt in Aug. I will be flying to Connecticut for an exam and one that will result in me being fully medically cleared. I am so happy and I feel blessed that I am able to be a part of such an amazing act of love!

July 6th 2008 ~  Sooooo......I talked to my intended parents today for the first time! This was the first one on one communication we have shared. Up until now, it has been through a third party....They are awesome! I can't wait to help them fulfill their dream of becoming parents. They are kind, considerate and loving. We are already making plans to take in a Broadway Show while we spend some time together in New York! I think this is going to be one of the most amazing experiences of my life........I am so happy.......

 August 10th ~ Hello friends!!

I hope this finds you well and things are good for you!

One of my intended parents and I just wrapped up our trip to see Dr. Doyle. It was a wonderful time and he was just great!! We are really looking forward to working with him!

Just a nutshell of how our visit went:

Thursday~Our flights arrived on time and we were quickly hugging and chatting away! We secured a rental car for 200.00 a day (outrageous)!! We then drove into Connecticut. When we arrived, we were quickly greeted by a tornado! Among all the fallen trees and wind, we found our way to the Marriott (very nice) and settled into the lounge for dinner and a few drinks to calm our nerves! Ha Ha

Friday: We went to Dr. Doyle's office in the morning, drove to the coast (breathtaking), drove into NYC and settled into a hotel. We then got ready and took in a Broadway Show!! We saw Mama Mia....it was wonderful!! We then were a victim of our total exhaustion and hailed a cab back to the hotel for a good night's rest....

Sat: We awoke early and went back into the city. We saw Times Square, The WTC site, Statue of Liberty and then went shopping at Macy's!!

Needless to say, we had a wonderful time!!

Bring on the transfer!

September 16th 2008 ~

Just a quick update! I just got my time line in today for my transfer! It looks like I will be heading back out to NYC and CT around October 30th and returning around the 3rd or 4th of November!! Hopefully returning carrying the precious children of my wonderful, generous, kind and loving intended parents...I'll update after the transfer!!

 

PS ~ I start shots on Friday!! Here we go.................

Brett and I met in 2001 after a mutual friend introduced us at a very lively dinner party in a restaurant in Oxford.  It was February 24th.  A few phone calls and emails later and we hit it off and by August of that year Brett had moved in with me in Leicester and we had got our Cocker Spaniel puppy Darcy who was just 8 weeks old.  We lived in domestic bliss for a few years when we decided that Darcy needed a friend and so welcome Sam, our wire-haired Jack Russell who we rehomed from a friend of my Mum's.  We moved to a bigger house that year (2004), acquired a few (5 to be precise) pet tortoises and that was our family...until now that is.  In 2006 after it became legal in the UK, Brett and I had a civil partnership ceremony. Fast foward to 2008 and our family we feel is not as complete as we once thought it was.  In April of this year we decided that we wanted to pursue surrogacy as a way of creating our own family.  We did a fair bit of internet research and purely by chance John Weltman from Circle Surrogacy in Boston was in London for a few days at the end of April and we got an appointment to meet with him.  The meeting only affirmed to us that we definately wanted to go ahead and we signed up within the next few days......

Matt and Brett are a happy, loving couple from Leicester, a cosmopolitan city in the United Kingdom about 100 miles north of the Capital London. They own a couple of dogs and have a passion for animals having enjoyed several Safari trips to Africa where Brett was born.   They have been together for seven years and are excited to take this next step in their lives together to become parents.  Matt and Brett have selected an egg donor and are matched with their gestational carrier Norma, who lives in Colorado.

Norma is a 33 year old,divorced mother of six children. After the surrogacy
she hopes to finish her B.S. degree and then enter a Masters' program . She is
a spirited, energetic woman who can't wait to help make her new friends
dads. 

They were brought together for this journey by Circle Surrogacy.

What follows is their experience of their journey together, from their own
perspectives, as they move through the stages of surrogacy toward
parenthood  for Matt and Brett.