November 2008 Archives

I got my results of my testing back today and it did not look good. We had what is called a "chemical" pregnancy. I have been instructed to stop all meds and we will try another IVF cycle in a month or two. The guys are holding up as well as any IP would during this rough time....We have been through such a rough week with the joy of positive HPT's and then the blow of a "chemical" pregnancy. I am grateful that Matt and Brett have been so compassionate towards me. I can't help but wonder how a surrogate must feel when her IP's are mourning their loss so much that they forget she is hurting too. I am truly blessed to have such wonderful friends. Tonight I put on my sweats, my pink fluffy socks the guys bought me during our trip, ate a HUGE piece of fudge and watched TV....I am feeling MUCH better! :)  I am still not sure if there was something else I could have done that would have prevented the loss but I'll drive myself crazy if I don't stop thinking about it. I know I did the best I could and that this cycle was just not meant to be. I am looking forward to us moving on and being successful next time. I can't help but think that the next cycle will be much easier on all of us because we have been through the worse possible outcome. I am eager to see what our future as friends holds and I look forward to the day when Matt and Brett's precious children are placed in their loving arms....

Well unfortunately this wasn't our time.....
We had our official beta test today and the result was 3 which is a clear negative test. We suspected this would be the case as we had an early beta 2 days ago which showed very low levels for the stage we were at and those levels have now dropped. I knew this was a possibile outcome, we all did but I don't think that any of us really expected it to happen....the road had been so smooth up until this point, it seemed nothing would go wrong. We now have to consider what our plan B will be as unfortunately we had no embryo's left to freeze after our donor cycle last month. We need to speak to our IVF physician and discuss our options. We haven't come this far to give up at the first failed transfer, but we don't yet know what our next step will be.....